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About Digital Art / Professional Premium Member Bianca20/Female/United States Groups :icona-monster-in-paris: A-Monster-in-Paris
 
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Desperate times calls for desperate measures...

Journal Entry: Wed Jul 2, 2014, 12:20 AM


Alright so...

I’m not being kicked out exactly, but I definitely cannot continue to stay here with my mom much longer. I’ve been wanting to go about it all the smartest way I can and not jump the gun with moving out, but I’ve been putting up with this garbage with my family (mostly my mom) for too long and I physically, mentally, and emotionally cannot stand it anymore.

I have to stay in Southern California to still have my doctors and dentist appointments I still need to do this summer before heading back to Colorado to be with Zuka again (I left suddenly before last Christmas Eve b/c of this same problem and stayed there in Colorado with Zuka and her folks for 5 months but I had been sick and was getting worse and had to go back home to my primary doctor, but also still needed my stuff to fully move out. I can’t just leave on a whim again this time like that).

I’m still trying to figure things out and I’m so stressed and anxious for the future and I don’t know what to do but I don’t want to have to be tied down to my mom anymore. I don’t want her to have that advantage over me anymore even though I can’t fully support myself yet. I need to be settled in before I can get an actual steady income somewhere. I’ve been doing freelance and commissions (which I’m still trying to keep up but being around my family like this makes it hard to get any work done at all, plus I need to be packing). I just can’t keep up with this anymore and I’ve been doing all I can on my own to try and keep my head over water but I feel like I’m drowning and I’m finally calling out for help.

I currently don’t have a car or even a permit or know how to drive (and don’t know if I physically can because of my how my OCD causes bad twitching)…. I feel pretty helpless in everything and I just… I don’t know what else to say or do at this point honestly…

I hope to get away from here and reuinted with Zuka as soon as possible so we can continue working on our stories and projects but also just be happy again in general… And Zuka says that she’ll help with the money but her own family has issues to take care of too… In the meantime may need to stay somewhere else aside from home before I can do that. Jumping to another state is a big move and I may not be able to do that right away but I can’t really stay here either. It’s a really difficult situation.

I’ve been trying to save with my commissions previously so that I can move out, but it’s been a very slow process and it hasn’t been enough. All the money has been going to my savings.

My goal was to reach $4,000 at the very least (and I was a few hundreds away so far) to have at least some support moving out if need be for a few months, but any more would be greatly appreciated. There’s just so many finances and crap that can come up you never know what a secure set amount is…

Any help at all would be greatly appreciated, guys.

I’m raising a flag up for help but I’m not giving up yet.

You can donate on my main blog here.



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Bonka-chan's Profile Picture
Bonka-chan
Bianca
Artist | Professional | Digital Art
United States
Current Residence: the middle of nowhere
Favourite genre of music: Almost any
Wallpaper of choice: Paperman
Skin of choice: Mine
Favourite cartoon character: George, Hiccup, Nightcrawler/Kurt Wagner, Finn the Human, Flynn Rider, Francoeur, Wheatley
Personal Quote: "I don't even know what I'm doing anymore..."
Interests

My tumblr

Bonkalore: bonkalore.tumblr.com/

I'm here more often than here these days and that's usually where I post when I'm streaming.

I just wanted to get rid of my super old poll. 

100%
728 deviants said Okay that's cool.

Comments


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:iconbasakward:
basakward Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Professional Filmographer
Lovely work!  Thank you kindly for watching!  I will be watching you as well!
Reply
:icontigerhuntingatnight:
TigerHuntingAtNight Featured By Owner 5 days ago  New member Hobbyist Artist
I LOVE YOUR ART!!!!!!
Reply
:iconbonka-chan:
Bonka-chan Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Professional Digital Artist
I'm glad! :)
Reply
:icontigerhuntingatnight:
TigerHuntingAtNight Featured By Owner 5 days ago  New member Hobbyist Artist
Eyup!
Reply
:iconmandapandacosplay:
MandaPandaCosplay Featured By Owner 6 days ago  New member Hobbyist Photographer
I must say that I absolutely ADORE your gallery! You have such an awesome style! ^_^ Keep up the great work!  
Reply
:iconbonka-chan:
Bonka-chan Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you! ^.^
Reply
:iconchillable:
chillable Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for the fave!
Reply
:iconartsyscribbler:
Artsyscribbler Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2014  New member Hobbyist General Artist
Are you going to continue your SR sonic series? Is it just on hold or completely put off?
Reply
:iconbonka-chan:
Bonka-chan Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
I don't know if I'll ever get to finish honestly. :( I have so many other bigger stories and projects to work on. Unless I was getting paid to do it, probably not...
Reply
:iconartsyscribbler:
Artsyscribbler Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2014  New member Hobbyist General Artist
I see...
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:icondazeddaisieso-o:
DazedDaisiesO-o Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for faving! :D
Reply
:icontsukyoamano:
TsukyoAmano Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2014
Hello! I think you may like this a lot, maybe :)

lulemee.deviantart.com/art/Dis…

It is a shame though that there's not a doll base for George :T
Reply
:iconbonka-chan:
Bonka-chan Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Ah, yes I faved that a while back. :) Really wish there was a George one hhhhh....
Reply
:iconkova360:
Kova360 Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2014
happy 4th of july
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:iconkova360:
Kova360 Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014
can I ask u something?
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:iconbonka-chan:
Bonka-chan Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Hm?
Reply
:iconkova360:
Kova360 Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014
well.....Idk if u do commissions or requests......but can u draw something for me....like old times
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:iconbonka-chan:
Bonka-chan Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
You should read my latest journal entry.
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(1 Reply)
:iconkova360:
Kova360 Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2014
do u want me to draw u something....like old times?
Reply
:iconlimontea:
LimonTea Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Thank U very much for the fave!
Find a minute to take a look at other my arts:
limontea.deviantart.com/galler…
behance.net/LimonTea
dribbble.com/LimonTea
artlimontea.tumblr.com/
:happybounce:
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